Talked to a friend this morning and realised that I have been a horrible friend because I did not know what she was going through and I’d seen photos on FB, Instagram and just thought that her life was fine. But I didn’t know that she was having a hard time. And I’d been so swamped with school and with all the new activities that I decided to take up this semester that we never found time to meet. And it really made me think about what is truly important in life. Having lived in Singapore all my life, I’m guilty of being part of the paper chase too and of putting so much importance on grades and on the eventual certificate that I will get. In IB, people always used to say “sleep, social life, studies – choose one” and I feel like things are still the same in uni. I have been choosing sleep (definitely hahaha) and studies – school activities, bible study and church activities that I feel like I’m compromising in the aspect of social life. By “social life” I don’t mean having a vibrant social life like going to parties every week, etc. But I’m referring to it more in the sense of meaningful relationships. I still do go out with my friends but I’ve been trying to ‘ration’ that, as silly as it might sound – to meet up with maybe only one or two friends a week (partly in an attempt to cut down on my spending but partly also because I need time for all my other activities). And in that sense, I feel like I am compromising on my relationships in general.
Maybe it’s the whole idea of Dunbar’s number – that there is a cognitive limit to how many stable social relationships one can maintain. The number stands at 150 as a comfortable number but maybe I don’t have the cognitive capacity (LOL) or maybe “stable relationships” mean acquaintances or something. But it makes sense though, that there is a limit to how many people you can be close to at one time.
Quite a few people have been talking about this X-factor audition from the latest season. I know I missed catching it on the television because I was stuck in the shower for quite a long time. It has been raining in Singapore so much lately that even when I turn on the heater, the water takes forever to turn warm so I end up having to just wait in the shower with the water running so that all the cold water will run and till my water turns hot. And that annoys me to no end, because WE PAY OUR UTILITY BILLS, HALLO. But I digress. So anyway, I watched this video today and yes, it is as amazing as everyone says it is. But I think it is also a very apt song to dedicate to the people that I love.
I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you’ve dreamed of
And I wish to you, joy and happiness
But above all this, I wish you love